To Fast or Not to Fast

So a bunch of my married friends observed Karva Chauth yesterday night. For those who do not understand what that means can google or simply understand it as a Hindu ritual where the wife fasts for the long life of her husband (without water) and finally breaks her fast after seeing the moon and then her husband through a netted vessel in the night. Bizzare, right? Is there any scientific proof that it helps? No, but there are these beautiful historic tales and situations when wives have done this and brought back their husbands from the clutches of death!

Now, I don’t have a problem with the entire thing and I respect women who fast for their husbands but I do have a problem with everything becoming a social activity (read hundreds of pictures of husband wives on Facebook showing them all dressed and breaking their fasts). Why this need of public display. What does it solve? Is it to be socially accepted as husband and wife by our society? Or is it simply that we have very few festivals to celebrate?

So a friend of mine pinged me asking if I am keeping the fast. I had considered keeping one only if my husband would fast for me I said. Thankfully, she is also a logic driven female and said she had to keep it last year since it was two days after the wedding and all eyes were towards the new bahu and now she is contemplating. Well our new generation is confused whether to blindly follow our mothers or to stand up and say, let me decide what I wanna do, let me have a healthy discussion and weigh options, let me be me.

I would love to see a more equal society where “mere pati mera devta hai” does not stand true any more. I know it would hurt peoples sentiments (read my granny). But I am equally surprised and happy that I can at least speak to them and tell them that I too can make my decisions! Recently I told my granny that I don’t need a mangal surta around my neck, red sindoor on my head, bangles and many more things on me to show that I am married just as my husband. I am equally committed and she just smiled! That’s a good start…